Yesterday's Gone, Yesterday's Gone

      I have to thank Leah for her comment on my last post. I know I said that the three types are Past Oriented, Present Oriented, and Future Oriented. However, I think that everyone slips into each view from time to time. All I'm getting at is that we tend to reside more in one than another.

      This is why the Past Oriented scares me.  I've been there.

      As much as I dwell in the future, I find it way too easy to get sucked into the past. Ever since I was little, I'd get uber nostalgic over things. Then I'd feel rather disappointed because I don't know how to find that feel or that happiness again. I didn't know any better at the time, but you can't get it back. It's over, it's gone.

      But once your average PaO realizes that, they might dig the hole even deeper.  

      Is it my fault? Did I lose this? Can I bring it back?

      I have fallen into this pit too many times. I'll decide that something was my fault. Then I sit and contemplate the past even more, trying to figure out how I could've fixed it.

      But that's the thing. It isn't always our fault. More times than not on these things, I had nothing to do with it. When you're a PaO it's just so easy to think it is. You want it back. You were the one who lost it.

      Or worse: You blame someone else.

      Residing in the past is also an excellent way to get down in the dumps, feeling depressed. Because yesterday's gone. And you liked it. You want to be the person you used to be. Sometimes we just have to wake up and realize that that person is gone and that a new one is here. Things have happened. Things have changed. That other you is never coming back. Maybe a similar one will, but never the same one. 

      I hope I haven't depressed you. Being a PaO isn't entirely full of cons. I'm just rather prejudiced against it at the moment, so feel free to send all your hate mail at me. It can also have some really good factors. You see what's happened before and you don't want it to happen again. You know how to avoid things. Maybe it'll translate wrong to other people, but you're most likely really good at protecting yourself and others. You've seen things happen and know how to circumnavigate them. After all, history does repeat itself, and it's best to be prepared when it does.

      The past isn't all that bad, it's just a scary place for me. I don't know, maybe because it's opposite of what I am. I might figure it out. . . .someday.

-K.G.

See you next time for the Present Oriented!